Sunday 13 April 2008

18sX Jokes

Since i was boring and nothing to blog about, here is some jokes for u people.
18-sX

(1)How many can you get right?

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her students.

The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?"

Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

Ms Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.

She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.


Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9".


Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36".


And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know. The principal looks at Ms Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the third-grade."

Ms Brooks says to the principal, "Can I ask him some questions?"

The principal and Harry both agree.


Ms Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment "Legs."


Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!
Harry replied, "Pockets."


Ms Brooks:"What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?"
Harry: "Coconut"

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry was taking charge.


Ms Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
Harry: "Bubblegum"


Ms Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?"
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.
Harry: "Shake hands"

Ms Brooks: "Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?"

Harry: "Yep."


Ms Brooks: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do."
Harry: "Tent"


Ms Brooks: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first."
The Principal was looking restless and bit tense.
Harry: "Wedding Ring"


Ms Brooks: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well,I drip. When you blow me, you feel good."
Harry: "Nose"


Ms Brooks: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver."
Harry: "Arrow"


Ms Brooks: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?
Harry: "Firetruck"


The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."


Got the joke ?

Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"It starts with P and ends with S.
In Principal mind>> "Penis"


Ms Brooks: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do."
In Principal mind>> "Poles = penis , Tie me down = on bed , wet before you do = usually gets wet first before the man "


Ms Brooks: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first."
In Principal mind>> "Finger = penis , You fiddle with me when you're bored = when bored go do *** , The best man always has me first = Principal*best man* "


Ms Brooks: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well,I drip. When you blow me, you feel good."
In Principal mind>> "many sizes = everyone got different sizes , not well I drip = when u *** sure drip , when blow me you feel good = when u **** sure feel good "


Ms Brooks: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver."
In Principal mind>> "Penis"


Ms Brooks: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?
In Principal mind>> "F*ck"

(2)Opened society in primary school.

In a second grade class, a little girl asks,
"Teacher, can my Mommy get pregnant?",

"How old is your mother, dear?" asks the teacher.
"Forty." she replies.

"Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant."

The little girl then asks, "Can my big sister get pregnant?"
"Well, dear, how old is your sister?"

The little girl answers, "Nineteen."

"Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant."

The little girl then asks, "Can I get pregnant?"

"How old are you, dear?"

The little girl answers, "I'm seven years old."

"No, dear, you can't get pregnant..."

Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says,


"See, I told you we had nothing to worry about!

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